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Friday, March 11, 2022

When that appointment with death comes too soon

My eldest daughter's college friend died on March 6 after a long and arduous battle with Muscular Sclerosis. It has taken me several days to muster the courage to address this very sad event, because he was such a fine young man - and he was only 34 years old!

Brit met Dave while attending the University of Illinois in Champaign-Urbana, and they became fast friends. Moreover, I had the good fortune to become acquainted with Dave during the year that I lived in Illinois to establish residency and obtain in-state tuition for my daughter. And I must say that I found him to be a friendly, polite, humorous, and extremely good-natured fellow.

During his time at school, he began dating a young lady at the school and fell in love - the way that young men do. They eventually asked me to perform their marriage ceremony, and I was so happy to do that for them. I remember the way that he looked at her and the sincerity in his voice. Later, they had a son together, and I've rarely seen a happier father than Dave was at the arrival of that little tyke.

Unfortunately, for Dave, the time of health and happiness was brief. He was diagnosed with MS, and the steady and relentless physical decline which followed was hard to watch - even from a distance. It wasn't long before Dave was in a wheelchair, and then eating and dressing became more difficult over time. Eventually, he was placed in a long-term care facility, and his marriage ended.

Remarkably, however, through all of that grief, sadness, and physical decline, Dave remained positive and forward thinking. He continued to be focused on his family and friends and tried his best to lift their spirits and appreciate whatever time he could have with them. Sensing that the end was near, he called all of his loved ones together to say goodbye. That accomplished, he went quietly - in his sleep, and without fanfare or regret.

I think about the years that he was denied. I think about all of the challenges and heartaches he had to confront in his brief time on this planet, and I wonder. Still, I hope that I can exhibit just a little of the grace and love that Dave exhibited when the time for my appointment arrives!

"And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away." - Revelation 21:4

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